You hear some funny conversations in waiting rooms.
I was up in Austin waiting to take a pee test for my new job. The room was crowded with truck drivers (I guess it was truck driver random drug test day?) and they were talking about who's hiring, and who pays what, etc. Two of the guys were with Goodwill, and one of the other guys asked if they were hiring. Another dude popped into the conversation and said he'd applied there, but they wouldn't take him because of his background. Another dude in the room said, "But Goodwill takes everybody - that's what they do, help folks out!" Then the other guy said, "Yeah, but they said their insurance won't cover me - I mean, I got a couple of murders and an assault on my record, so they said they're afraid I might snap at work or something."
Then he added, "Yeah, they'll take all the other felonies - but they won't cover assault." He kept harping on the assault, not the COUPLE OF MURDERS. Does Goodwill take murderers but not assaulters? (As Doc D said: Assault just means you can't carry things through to reach your goal.)
---------------------------------------------------------------Mal de Ojo!
I got a call from Trani and she told me all kinds of funny-crazy crap was going on in Hell. It seems somebody put a hex on NRA! Of course, Trani thought your humble author was responsible, but I didn't do any of it! Really!!
First off, NRA was doing an experiment, and she poured something into a supposedly new, clean tube, but her solution turned blue! (This happened to me once in Organic lab - we were identifying unknowns and my stuff turned blue and no one could figure out why. Odd because everything in organic chem is either colorless or yellow...) Anyway, she carried on despite the blue, but in the end, only half of her samples worked. (I did the same with my organic experiment - I identified my unknown incorrectly, but it was a similar
compound to the one I determined it to be.) I'm pretty sure this was the work of evil and disgruntled smurfs.
Next, Cakes tried to use some water from NRA's big carboy, but NRA told her not to because her water was bad. Trani went over and opened the bottle and was blasted with a wave of funk that she described as seriously bad milk. They looked, but the water was perfectly clear - no sign of growth or anything - just the stench. NRA was afraid to dump the water, knowing that the smell would overtake the lab - so she took the jug to the back lab to release the toxic waste.
NRA was perplexed, and Trani told her that someone had given her the Ojo
, and she should probably light her "Good Luck" candle. NRA agreed, but when she tried to light her candle, it wouldn't stay lit!! Creepy!
A little later, NRA went into the fish room and noticed that the door to the room wouldn't shut. Trani went and looked and found that the bottom of the door was hitting the floor, keeping it from closing all the way. They immediately thought that the building had shifted again. (Side note: the building has two parts, the old and the new - the new part apparently shifted some time after the whole thing was remodeled, and there was a gap that was up to about two-inches wide in some places between the old and new sections.) So, they went to "check the crack" to see if it was now something more like a gaping hole. Guess what? The crack was NOWHERE TO BE FOUND! I guess the building just shifted back to where it was supposed to be??
Now, I know I said that I was blameless for all of this, but I gotta admit right here, right now, that YES, I brought a crane to campus the other night, and YES I totally shifted the building. (It was a real bitch hiding that crane from the cops, man! I disguised it by painting yellow and brown spots on it, and told San Marcos' finest
that it was a giraffe. Worked like a charm...)
Later that night was the big TR/Sabbath Crow/Adrian show at Headhunters.DocD, YHA and Heather
DocD and I were swarmed by this small pack of Ohio State fans:
who latched onto us like leeches! I think it was simply because we were the least tattooed and least dyed - and therefore the least intimidating
- girls in the place...
They were actually pretty nice, though. At one point they called DocD "Miss Texas". She corrected them: "That's DOCTOR Texas."
The bands were great. D'Ablo got up and jammed with the TRs - he'd only practiced with them a couple of times, so there was some pretty funny non-verbal (as in "what the fuck is he playing?") communication being tossed back and forth between DxB and him.
SC was great - and this time J. did NOT make my ears bleed! Slacker.J.
Patrice Pike got up and sang Communication Breakdown
with Adrian, which was cool. (Well, she sang at
it - every note was perfect, but she admittedly didn't know the words!)
After the show was over, we all headed to IHOP and ate like pigs. PIGS, I tell you! I think we got home at 5:30 in the morning. Good times.