What kind of fool puts windows in the roof?

Russell J. Heater

September 17, 1926 - April 20, 1990

I took the day off work so I could have some "alone time" today. Planned on going out to the cemetery at Fort Sam - that kind of stuff.

DxB went in to work for about a half-hour, then came home to tell me that he wanted to move out. (Here we go again.) I was really in NO mood, so things got interesting quickly. I would give you the details, but frankly, you've heard them all before and actually, I kind of don't remember what they were. I wasn't even sure what happened by the time he went back to work. I mean, I wasn't sure if he was going to come back home, or what. Apparently sometime during this "fight" he remembered that today was my "bad day" and he kind of backed off a bit.

So I head out to San Antonio, stopping to pick up red carnations for my friend BernBean's dad's grave, orange roses for Mom, and the longest yellow glads I've ever seen for Dad. I get to Fort Sam and suprisingly, I found BernBean's Dad with little problem. (I always use his stone as a visual line-of-sight-thing to find my parents' spot.) I'm sitting there kind of being sad and missing the 'rents, and I notice that the oak tree that was planted when Dad was planted is doing great. It's big and full and shades Mom, Dad and their next door neighbors so nicely.

Now, the sky was a little wonky all afternoon - horrific heat and some cold front moving through - that can mean big trouble... So, I'm still sitting there, under that oak, when I glanced over to my left and BLAM! A HUGE lightning bolt shot out of the sky and slammed the field next to the cemetery. The ensuing thunderclap was instantaneous, meaning it was time to get the F out of there. (I thought about how ironic it would be to get turned into a charred cinder while sitting on my parents' grave... Hell, no need for a burial, just water my ash into the dirt and carve my name in the stone!)

By the time I got home, Doppler radar was basically one huge red/magenta mass over the entire town of San Marcos. I put the Z in the garage just in time for the hail to start. At first it was small - dime size or so. A few minutes later it was about quarter-size. DxB and I (he did come home after all) sat there staring at the goddamned SKYLIGHTS in our ceiling just waiting for one of those suckers to shatter. But, the hail got smaller again and finally subsided. I looked out the window and got a bit puzzled... the storm had been moving southeast and the rain and hail was falling from a northern angle. Now (that the hail had stopped) the rain was coming from the opposite direction! Holy crap! The trees were swirling like crazy and I thought for sure it was a tornado. (It wasn't.) Then the hail started. Again. But this time it was much more fun. Golf-ball plus size! Yee-haw, welcome to Texas.

Remarkably, that big hail was relatively soft, so nothing really got damaged. Maybe a few dents in the Honda, a few leaves and roses beaten up. We felt pretty lucky. When the storm finally passed, we drove down the road to check out the damage. Once again, Holy Crap! Not more than a half mile from out house there was incredible damage. Our neighbors had trees completely denuded by hail, house windows broken, cars dented and windowshields shattered. It was amazing. I have no idea how we missed that shit, but I'm pretty sure the gods are just fucking with us and we will be on the receiving end of a major shitstorm next time!

Always,

S